Stop Apologizing for Being Politically Incorrect

I've got a small idea for you today. A simple idea but one, which I hope is going to be very impactful, if you happen to suffer from the same problem that I do.

When I used to speak on the stage all the time, when I would speak in front of Toastmasters, and Rotarys, and business networking groups, and things like that, I noticed that I would get rave reviews and great feedback, but especially early on in my presentations a problem which always plagued me was apologizing. When I made a mistake, when I said something that wasn't quite accurate, when I felt self-conscious about a socially unacceptable point of view, I would apologize. I would say "Sorry" immediately after saying something that a lot of people found impactful, and they felt was powerful. Because I said "Sorry" people would look at my presentation and that idea, which they initially liked less favorably.

                                I would take away from the power of what I was saying by apologizing. I catch myself doing this these days much less often, but one way, which I really catch myself doing this is when I am saying something that's politically incorrect, when I'm saying something that other people, most likely don't like, and that is likely to ruffle some feathers. The problem with apologizing when you're saying something is that unless the other person has expressed that they're unhappy with what you said, you could be apologizing for something that the other person enjoyed, and agreed with, and found value in.

                                It also sub-communicates and signals to yourself that you don't even like your own opinions, that you don't really like yourself. So if you are like me, someone who in certain situations often apologizes for their opinions, stop doing it. Because all it's doing is teaching you, and teaching everyone around you to discount your ideas and dislike you. 

It will reduce your self-esteem, it will reduce your esteem in other people's eyes, and it has no positive trait, to assume that you are intrinsically bad, or that your ideas are intrinsically unpleasant. So watch yourself, meditate on yourself, and see if maybe you have been doing the same thing for years, and years, and not been aware of it. That's the wild thing, is it's very easy to not be aware of doing small things like this because they're so habitual, and so deeply ingrained in us. Take care.